Sunday 23 December 2018

Bah humbug!

I was feeling the urge to write as I don’t seem to have written much of late except the occasional plug for my latest children’s book but at this time of year, I find myself obsessed with Christmas. Actually, to be more precise I would say my wife is obsessed with Christmas and I am doing my best to assist her in the process.

I have mentioned before that I have objections to Christmas, not you understand the actual holiday itself but the enormous waste of money spent on food, drink and worst of all vastly expensive presents for all and sundry.

My ideal Christmas celebration would consist of one of my wife’s rather splendid chicken dinners with all the trimmings, some wine, some spirits and a few beers or lagers and no presents whatsoever.

We obviously have quite a few people over for Christmas which may explain why I am having trouble getting by the mountainous pile of presents which have accumulated round the Christmas tree.

This post has been interrupted at least two times as we have had to visit the supermarket on numerous occasions to stock up with vast amounts of food sufficient to survive a nuclear holocaust.

We have as I write just returned from such a trip and I noticed as I went around quite a number of strong men standing by their trolleys with sunken eyes, staring into the middle distance, for I too know that look. They had lost the will to live and some like me were close to tears.

When we finally unloaded everything and I had finished painting the banister rail for the hall, stairs and landing which we had to redecorate, although quite why it was so important it had to be done at Christmas, I have no idea but the priorities of a woman are far different from those of a man. Personally, I would have thought that finishing the head gasket on my Morris Minor which I started some months ago was far more important, but who’s to say.

All I have to do tomorrow is put up the Irish flag bunting and the orange, white and green balloons and the rest of the paraphernalia which will enable us to have our Irish themed Christmas and I can settle down on Christmas day and enjoy a few Guinness whilst listening to The Dubliners and The Wolfe Tones and others for a few jigs and reels.

Well that’s my post for today, all that is left for me to do is to apologise to everyone who is still waiting for their Christmas cards to arrive, as we have been very busy this year and to wish all my friends and readers a Happy Christmas and a wonderful New Year.

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